Monday, October 31, 2011

Red Beans and Rice Monday: Halloween Tricks and Treats

I should not be taking precious time from my newly crafted blogging schedule to write this, but sometimes exceptions must be made.  So perhaps I can kill two birds with the same stone...

All over the Twitterverse earlier this afternoon was the news that celebu-tart Kim Kardashian had filed for divorce from her husband of two months and nearly two weeks, NBA player Kris Humphries.  They were married in a lavish ceremony in August, which just aired in a primetime TV special in October.  (These facts are provided solely for the purpose of those who have not been Keeping up with the Kardashians lately :)  The wedding promo is still running on the freakin' E! site!

I could write an entire post based on the previous paragraph...but here is where I return to my regularly scheduled topic, which happens to be Halloween.  Based on the timing (for had they waited to get hitched on Valentine's Day, it would have been too obvious to announce plans to divorce on April 1st), it is quite clear that Kim K and Kris Humphries' marriage was all some massive trick!

And who is gonna top that one, boo?

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

It's Our Anniversary!

(Well, it was back on October 5 when I started writing this initially...but please read on :)

Ten years ago, on the night of October 4, I was wide awake and worried about coming down with a cold.  It had taken us six hours to get to New York and then another hour or so to find our way to White Plains because apparently clearly marked exit signs only exist on the New Jersey Parkway.  Anyway, after finally settling in for the night, I called my parents and my father assured me that he would get in touch with my younger brother who was away in college to let him know what was going to happen the next day.

The next day was a beautiful autumn Friday in New York City, and my then-boyfriend of five years and I rode down to Manhattan with a couple of friends from college to get hitched at City Hall.  Of course, nothing went as planned.  We left late and got stuck in midday traffic.  The ceremony was taking place three weeks after 9/11/01 just a few blocks away from what had become known as Ground Zero and workers were still searching through the rubble.  Police were everywhere, so we had to go through several security checks just to drive close enough to be let off near the clerk's office.  Not all of our friends were there at the right time, and we almost forfeited our slot because the office closed earlier than we anticipated.  To this day, I am positive that the ceremony was conducted almost entirely in Spanglish.  Later I learned that my father had casually told my brother that I had gotten married two days after the fact.  And both of us went back to work that Monday morning as if nothing major had happened at all.

Belated September Reset Recap

So I finally posted the September Reset Journal, and so now I wanted to offer a recap of sorts to summarize (for those of you who are not all that interested in reading a day-to-day rehash of the month of September :)

I did ok.  If I were to have given myself a grade, it might have been a D because the perfectionist in me would still be upset about all of the  things I did not accomplish last month (like not cleaning my house, or not making it to church every Sunday, or for not working out three times a week).  Instead, because I know that I am not perfect and God willing, there is always next month, I will give myself a C-.

And I will drink from the half-full glass to acknowledge the things I did accomplish, like avoiding alcohol for the entire month (I even took Alka Seltzer instead of NyQuil when I got sick).  I spent quality time with the husband.  I went to church more often than I have in years.  I woke up early a few times and I arrived on time for a few things.  And I am proud to say that I did accomplish a lot in terms of soul-searching, thanks in large part to the Happy Black Woman 31-Day Reset.  While I am not a radically different person (for there is much room for improvement, such as finishing projects that I start) I am a person who understands why the power to change must come from within. 

And that is my big AHA revelation.  No matter how bad things seem, I can triumph.  I think about how my car was broken into again, and how I chose not to fly off into a rage and simply opted to forgive.  I think about the challenges facing my family because of my Mother's condition, and trust me, being angry at the world did nothing to change the reality of the situation.  Deciding on a course of action has been much more beneficial.  Let's face it, life is hard, yet there is a lot of joy to be found on the margins.  And so, as often as I can, I will look for the joy.

At some point it occurred to me that I already knew this and I had what I will call a 'ruby slipper' moment.  You remember that part at the end of the Wizard of Oz when Dorothy is told by Glenda the Good Witch that she could have gone home at the very beginning if she had just clicked her heels three times while in Munchkin Land--before meeting the Scarecrow, Tinman and the Lion; before meeting the fake Wizard; and before having to confront the Wicked Witch of the West.  Armed with that information at the outset, Dorothy could had avoided all of the unnecessary drama, but she also would never have gained the wisdom, compassion and courage that she needed to face her various obstacles.  Thus, the power to change my outlook and reactions, to ability to empathize, and the strength to deal with whatever curve balls life hurls at me is right here inside of me.  Yes, I might prefer to avoid the unpleasantness, but in order to get to that joy, sometimes the sidetrip through Oz is inevitable...

PS: For those of you who prefer The Wiz, a 'silver slipper' moment is technically the same thing!

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

The Busy Black Woman Returneth!

For those of you who might have noticed that I had not written anything since the beginning of October (and for those who did notice), I'm back!  And I have so much to say that it is hard to know where to I will start at the beginning.

I intended to write a post back at the beginning of the month about my September reset, but then I started another post about the Obamas and my 10th wedding anniversary, which I did not finish before the trip to New York for the niece's wedding, and I only had a day to prepare for the trip to Puerto Rico for a week (sans laptop), so by the time I got back and spent most of last week ripping and running around, it was time for Blogalicious weekend.

And I just noticed today that I pretty much abandoned you all for the month of October. AACCK!

So here is the deal, I will spend the remainder of this month on all of the unfinished and partially completed drafts and ideas that were supposed to be posted by now: the September reset recap, the beauty of weddings and anniversaries, my vacation, my reflections on Blogalicious, and finally Halloween.  That makes five articles in six days, so while I am not making any promises, I hope that you will come back into the Busy Black Woman fold anyway to see what happens next!

Monday, October 3, 2011

October Surprise

I did not intend to write a blog marking the start of October by mentioning that my car got broken into AGAIN...probably by the same crackhead that rifled through it the last time.  And again, this time the police came and took a report that will probably end up in the unsolved case file because no one gives a crap about a car that was broken into and was only deprived of meter change (even if it was not the only car that was targeted, which is a crucial point to mention since it was a neighbor who alerted us to the crime this morning after noticing that his car and another neighbor's car had been rifled through).

And if you are worried that this will be another rant, it won't because after speaking with the officer at length about what might have happened this time around, I...will save my feelings for a little later, so please read on (but no, this is not another rant).  The officer suggested that the culprit might have been a known entitity who has caused mischief for years around these parts, and then went on to tell the husband and me how this person has been locked up a few times, homeless, and get this--raised in this very neighborhood!

What in the world???!!!