Free Brittney!

In a recent social media argument with someone whom I don't know (because isn't that the point, to get froggy with strangers), the topic was about the lanes we choose whenever there is some incident that relies on our perpetual culture wars to inform our opinions. I had posted an article on the Facebook page about the case of Brittney Griner, the WNBA player who is currently being detained in Russia.

Griner, who plays for the Phoenix Mercury during the regular WNBA season and for the UMMC Ekaterinberg in Russia, was detained at the airport in February. The news of her detainment was released on March 5, days into the conflict that is currently ongoing between Russia and the Ukraine. Griner was arrested and charged with allegedly importing vape cartridges containing hash oil in her luggage and could face up to ten years in jail. More than a dozen other American WNBA players scheduled to play this season in Russia and the Ukraine are back in the US, consistent with U.S. State Department travel advisories. In recent remarks, Secretary of State Antony Blinken stated that efforts were underway to secure her release (along with two other Americans also being detained). 

In my FB commentary, I pointed out how reactions to Griner's predicament tracked the cultural fault lines of intolerance, namely race, queerness, patriotism, and diplomacy. In other words, a third of the comments expressed concern, a third felt it served her right for having broken the law, and a third were asking who she was and why they should care. Once I read the meager details that have been released so far and posted the article, a guy we'll call Mr. Toad came to my page to offer his rUlEs ArE rUlEs take, proving my hypothesis that some people would rather hold tight to their politics than see the entire picture, right or wrong.

I'll start with the low-hanging fruit to address the diplomatic angle that had some folks loudly proclaiming that if TFG was still President, Griner would have been home by now. Sure, if diplomacy was the same as selling swamp land as prime real estate. TFG might have won the Pyrrhic victory of securing her release on paper, while trading away something far more costly to the detriment of the rest of the world. Don't forget this same guy got impeached for trying to blackmail the Ukrainian President for information on the current President's son. If you honestly think he would have done a better job, try to imagine how much he would have been willing to wager just to save face in an actual diplomatic face-off with Russia...

My guess is that none of it would matter once we're all dead from the subsequent nuclear blast. No one would be around to identify our disintegrated corpses in the rubble. And because con man luck rarely runs out, he would be safe in a bunker, praising himself until his handlers, driven to near madness after enduring a week of his endless prattle, would escape to try their luck in the fallout.

As you are contemplating that mushroom cloud, let me remind you that my generation has vivid memories of the Cold War as dramatized by the 80s nuclear disaster movie, The Day After (1983). EVERY Gen Xer who is currently watching the events unfold in the Ukraine is having flashbacks. Those aspects of our childhood are why so many of us fear for Griner's safety and fate. In our worldview, the Soviet Union was evil.

The Soviets were the Klingons in the classic Star Trek (before they hired a better makeup artist). They were our greatest sporting nemesis at the Olympics, which is why we boycotted the Moscow Summer Games in 1980 and they returned the favor by skipping the Los Angeles Games in 1984. It is why we booed whenever wrestler Nikolai Volkoff was scheduled to appear on the Saturday WWF lineup. We actually used to chant U-S-A in our living room during his singing of the Soviet anthem. The space race was about beating the Soviets. Our need to beat the Soviets at everything is why we tolerated a fourth Rocky movie; it is what kept the James Bond franchise going after Sean Connery quit; and it is why Indiana Jones as President in Air Force One didn't seem all that improbable. (Jones always beat the Nazis, so of course he could undo the Russian plot to assassinate the U.S. President. Americans hated the Soviets as much as the Nazis!)

Or at least we used to. But as I climb out of that morass, I need y'all to remember that point. Many of us grew up in an era where we didn't praise or extol anything Russian, not even vodka. We cheered when talented Russian artists and athletes defected to America: Mikhail Baryshnikov, Martina Navratilova, and Nadia Comaneci. The entire comedy career of Yakov Smirnoff was based on his coming to America. When the wall came down in East Germany and the Soviet Union disintegrated soon after, we danced in the streets! 

So for some, it is partly understandable how the fault line of patriotism gets tripped by Griner's situation. She's a two-time Olympic gold medalist, who has been playing professional basketball in Russia during the off-season for years. Record scratch--how dare she! No matter how much more she was paid, because not all money is good money...right? Oh wait say that again, her salary as a professional WNBA player doesn't even come close to what a rookie NBA player makes? She doesn't have a lucrative endorsement deal nor star in a bunch of commercials for subpar sandwiches or racist pizza? Ahh, but she made some comment about standing for the National Anthem, so that's what makes her a socialist. Even though our athletes have the right of free speech and the freedom to pursue wealth anywhere in the world, maybe some time spent in the Russian gulag will cause her to appreciate how good she had it in America.

Did I mention that she is a two-time U.S. Olympic GOLD MEDALIST? Does that not count as sufficiently patriotic? Or have you sing or die flag zealots who insist on superficial gestures as more evocative actually embraced Soviet-style genuflection?

The Black, female, and queer angle are also predictable fault lines. Last summer we learned first-hand how some of you don't give a hot damn about Black women in sports, regardless of what they might be enduring off the court. Naomi Osaka couldn't have space to deal with her anxiety. Simone Biles almost spun out of control in a mid-air flip, but she should have toughed it out for the sake of her team. Sha'Carri Richardson shouldn't have smoked a joint to numb the pain of losing her mother. Being a queer woman also irks these red-hatted Americans who don't much like Megan Rapinoe or her pink hair. Our girls need women they can look up to, they claim...until they notice that all of the American figure skaters are Asian American...(thanks for fixing that racist headline NYT)

Now comes the unapologetically Black, female, and queer Brittney Griner. All of the fault lines converge to polarize reactions to the case of an American citizen who is being held in Russia and stands accused of drug trafficking. The outrage is not that she's been in custody for three weeks or that her family has no information about her physical condition or that our State Department can't even assure her safe return because the situation is just that volatile. Y'all only see your politics. As Mr. Toad calmly asserted, she did the crime she must do the time. As if every detail offered by the Russians should be taken at face value! 

How is Brittney Griner any kind of international drug menace if what she was carrying in her luggage was for personal use? She didn't get caught with powder cocaine condoms stuffed in unmentionable body cavities. I don't know much about vaping, but you can buy vape pens at Walmart, so whatever the European equivalent is (el Corte Ingles perhaps), why are y'all reacting like she was on the run from having robbed the place? I know even less about hash oil, but I will earnestly ask if any of you L&O folks ever considered the following possibilities: (a) she was aware of the laws; (b) she had brought these items in her luggage on previous occasions without incident; (c) she's being set up to look like she's part of some drug cartel; and (d) she is being treated like a high-profile pawn. When Secretary Blinken addressed the press, he mentioned the names of the two other American prisoners in Russia, Paul Whelan and Trevor Reed, whose release our government has been trying to secure. Yet the Russians only released the video and details of Griner's arrest to the press in the fog of war.

Y'all are on Al Gore's internet engaging in the very kind of propaganda-influenced speculation about Griner's guilt based on nothing other than what the Russians said she that did. 

The fault lines are exposed. When the North Koreans claimed that Otto Warmbier had stolen a poster, we were outraged that he would be sentenced to 15 years of hard labor. When LiAngelo Ball and two UCLA teammates were arrested for shoplifting at a Louis Vuitton store, a crime to which they confessed to having committed, the bigger story was that TFG had prevailed upon China to secure their release. The case of A$AP Rocky being imprisoned in Sweden for assault is another demonstration of the diplomatic negotiating "skills" of TFG. Well, I say if Trumpelthinskin actually had that kind of juice, he could intervene and offer to help Griner since he is such good friends with Putin...

But you know he won't. Not only is there nothing for him to gain by speaking up for Griner, but Putin changed his phone number and stopped taking TFG's calls last January. As for all of that bravado he touted, Warmbier tragically died days after his release. As a consequence, the North Koreans were rewarded with a high-profile summit but were never held accountable. LiAngelo Ball and A$AP Rocky both fared better personally, but our diplomatic relations with China are still toxic and Trump never did convince the Swedes to award him a Nobel Peace Prize. Now you know why my mushroom cloud isn't off base.

In all seriousness, Brittney Griner has the same chance of surviving this as the Ukrainians fleeing the war zones on the ground, and those are not favorable odds. When a madman declares his intent to punish the ENTIRE FUCKING WORLD because we won't let him conquer another sovereign nation, the response should never be to cheer on his ambition and courage. Or to accept any of his propaganda as irrefutable truth. This is not a game or one of many Hollywood movies where the megalomaniac is tripped up by his own hubris (I mean, Putin might be, but a LOT of folks will die before that happens). Our genuine fears for Griner's life aren't based on idle hysteria, and the casual way that some of you dismiss her plight as acceptable according to the premise that she assumed the risk is troubling. 

SHE IS AN AMERICAN. That is not up for debate nor does it need to be qualified on the basis of your political leanings. I thought we never left any of our people behind. I thought we believed that if you mess with one of us, you mess with all of us. There should already be an Operation Free Brittney in the works in a Navy SEAL or Green Beret situation room. I am serious, we should be MAD the same way we were during the Iran Hostage Crisis (yes, Gen Xers remember that one too). When did we adopt conditions? When was it decided that being Black, female, queer, and outspoken were legit reasons to sit back and watch shit happen to one of our own? Y'all claim to love that flag and the republic for which it stands, so what does that mean if you ignore that it symbolizes liberty and justice for ALL? 

(L-R) Griner, Paul Whelan and Trevor Reed

BBW Review of 'Eggs Over Easy'

It took me two viewings to absorb everything that was being communicated in the documentary, Eggs Over Easy, which aired January 4 on OWN. (Now I remember why I missed Michelle Obama on black-ish :)

Normally, I would have just posted some quick thoughts on the Facebook page, but somehow I knew that I would feel compelled to say more. The stories of nearly every woman in my personal circle were represented in this documentary. (It helps that the filmmaker, contributors, and several of the producers are my Spelman sisters. Because if ever there was a community of Black women whose lives run the gamut of fertility issues...)

I have not been very public about my own fertility journey, even though I did share aspects of my story here a few years ago. And every year, I re-tell the story about the horrible weekend in August 2014 when I thought I had lost my pregnancy in its early stages, but how miraculously my daughter showed up in defiance of the data that indicated otherwise. I won't go into too much more detail here (since it is a story you can read for yourself come next August), and because I really prefer to focus attention on the documentary. It reaffirmed my strong belief that Black women's fertility, maternity, and overall healthcare outcomes are the result of the systemic failure to separate women's health concerns from politics instead of offering actual care.

In other words, abortion sucks ALL of the oxygen out of the rooms where these necessary conversations should be taking place.

Next year will mark the 50th anniversary of Roe v. Wade, if it withstands the legal challenges brought by reactionary legislatures in states like Mississippi, Arkansas, North Dakota, Louisiana, and Ohio, among others. Due to the incessant attention paid to that debate, many of the other reproductive health concerns that women face garner less public attention. The only other women's health issue that generates comparable interest is breast cancer. If the primary health concern for women of child-bearing age is maintaining optimal reproductive health, then that should include an emphasis on preserving and enhancing fertility, treating the various health challenges that compromise fertility, supporting maternal health during pregnancy, and ensuring safe deliveries. Of course, there are a host of other health concerns that are significant and unrelated to procreation, such as cardiovascular and mental health. Then there are the economic realities of having access to affordable health care, secure housing, and reliable child care, but if ALL we ever talk about is the life of the unborn but not the quality of life for women and their families...

Not to mention, there are women, like many of my friends, who choose to defer having children until they achieve various milestones in life. The women who believe in attaining the stability of marriage and their own career. The women who face serious health conditions such as uterine fibroids, endometriosis, and polycystic ovarian syndrome (PCOS). The women who have reached the advanced maternal age of having more money but fewer options. There are so many women whose opportunities to pursue motherhood are limited by the types of jobs they hold and whether there is adequate insurance coverage or institutional support for non-traditional family structures. Those are some of the stories that were shared in this documentary. 

One of the central truths expressed in this film is that having a child should always be a personal choice. Whether to proceed with an unplanned pregnancy or what to do if a pregnancy fails. Whether to subject oneself to the spectrum of hormonal birth control options or to choose a more permanent solution. Why do we make this so hard and why do we stigmatize any outcome that doesn't result in a woman embracing motherhood as life's highest honor? Especially since we penalize motherhood as well (another piece for another time). For when we frame the matter as a choice between the life of the unborn and that of a living woman, how is that not treating motherhood as a punishment for sexual behavior?

And how does that dichotomy serve women in those gray areas? Is the woman who chooses not to become a mother any less a woman? 

That is a rhetorical question, but one that offers me a reason to share from my own story. Ten years ago, I had determined that I would accept not becoming a mother and had settled into the idea of being a PANK (professional aunt, no kids). However, my feelings changed when my Mom was diagnosed with early-onset dementia. I decided to look into adoption and fertility treatments. When I reached a particularly frustrating point in caregiving where I saw nothing else in my foreseeable future, I made the choice to pursue fertility treatments. My gamble was that it would be the least disappointing and emotionally involved of the two options, because if it didn't work out, adoption would still be available. Or I could resolve to lean into my anti-parentness.

Of course, as you know, IVF was successful and I became a mother at 41 years old. Let me say that I never doubted whether I was already a full woman before getting pregnant, and since we're being honest, I can assure you I don't feel any more or less assured that gendered roles have any real merit in society. In my experience, women bear the brunt of caregiving, whether that is for our children or for others in our families or communities. Plenty of women who never had children of their own have been blessings to me by virtue of their generosity of spirit and wisdom. So let's dismiss this notion that womanhood and motherhood are interchangeable. 

Instead, we must reframe the structure of the medical discussions that take place for women in their child-bearing years to offer a full buffet of choices that are honored and respected. It starts with comprehensive sex education so that 16 year olds aren't becoming parents before they are mature enough to handle the responsibility. For single women in their 20s and 30s, conversations about child-bearing shouldn't be conditioned upon marital status. It can be as simple as asking a woman if she ever wants to have children and then explaining her options. It was a shock for me to learn that single woman aren't even given full agency over their own fertility. Because I had been married for a certain amount of time and had not gotten pregnant, that raised a red flag about my fertility, although it took years until the issue was accurately diagnosed. So here's something else--we aren't doing any better about talking to men either unless the issue is about sexual function. 

In light of these revelations and the fact that I started writing this a few weeks ahead of the annual Right to Life marches in DC (January 21), as well as before the Supreme Court vacancy was announced (January 26), I will take a minute to expound on my statements about the shadow of abortion over every aspect of reproductive health. Abortion is healthcare, period. For women who face that difficult choice, it should not be stigmatized. Particularly since most women do not use abortion as birth control or causally decide to end a pregnancy (not that it matters). There are women who learn midway through a much-wanted pregnancy that there are abnormalities that prevent the likelihood of a live birth and possibly endanger her own life. How does being branded as selfish support making the best individual choice? Or having that choice criminalized based on the state where you live?

Yet, some of these same people insist that public health mask mandates are an encroachment on their individual liberty.

Again, the focus of Eggs Over Easy is not abortion, but choice. Yet, whenever these discussions boomerang back to abortion, it illustrates to me how this comes down to basic body autonomy and how NO woman is free unless all women are free. Despite what we think, women are not free. If no one ever raises the issue of fertility to a single, unmarried woman until her 40th birthday, then she is not free. If a married women needs the permission of her husband to determine the size of her family, then she is not free. If we are debating whether to educate teenagers about birth control during the most vulnerable phase of their physical development, then our daughters and nieces are not free. If we stigmatize personal choices as selfish, are still adhering to ancient biblical notions of motherhood as a curse, then women are not free.

The ultimate takeaway from Eggs Over Easy...we are not free. Despite what they tell us.

(Now that two months have passed since it aired, nothing has changed. Not with the Supreme Court nomination, the State of the Union Address, March being Women's History Month, or anything else. Women still need to be prepared to fight for our reproductive rights in the doctor's office as well as the ballot box.)

Babar the Babarian and Other Children's Stories

On a recent night, I took on the bedtime duties for my daughter, and as is our practice, I chose a book. Like most children, she has a few favorites, but I usually let the Hub get caught in that repeat loop. Instead, I choose a book at random, just to introduce some variety. We have a mix of books, including several that were mine as a child, so every now and then, I will pick one of those titles to introduce her to some beloved character from my youth. 

On this particular night, I chose The Story of Babar. It was not the best choice...

At one point, I actually had to stop and comment on how peculiar certain events were, and my daughter agreed in the manner that six-year olds understand things. After we finished reading, she turned over and went to sleep. As soon as her eyes were closed, I pulled out my phone to check in with the omniscient Google, because somebody else had to recognize and deconstruct the various problems of the original story. Sure enough, I saw where there were some criticisms mentioned on its Wikipedia page, as well as a few articles that addressed the controversies more in depth. One of the best articles I read was this anti-imperialist take written in 2017 wherein the author does an excellent job of highlighting the subtle racist and sexist elements in the original Babar story. I sat there in disbelief--how was this my first time noticing any of this? Hence, another salient point made in the article, that the subtlety and simplicity of the imagery had us all hoodwinked, bamboozled, led astray, run amok!

But I'm woke now!

Since others have done the heavy lifting in pointing out how this beloved children's classic, written in 1931 by French author Jean de Brunhoff, is very much reflective of the time in which it was created, there is no need for me to reinvent that wheel. The Story of Babar becomes problematic from the moment his mother is killed and he runs away to freaking Paris...all the way from Sub-Saharan Africa??? Some unnamed rich Old Lady just hands her purse to a random elephant on the street and then moves him into her house? He marries his younger cousin? He returns to become King of the Forest because he mimics the humans and no other Alpha male elephant in the pod challenges that? And the lions just accept it too? WTF? 

But I'm not here to denounce our beloved anthropomorphic literary and cartoon characters. Because there is still a 35+ year old copy of Babar on my daughter's bookshelf. I know that my Grandmother probably read it to me, and possibly my Aunt E (who taught Kindergarten for decades, so that was me and hundreds of other kids). Actually, my introduction to Babar was through another story, Babar Loses His Crown (1967), which we had in our Dr. Suess collection (another author whose work has been reconsidered in recent years). I know that there was a cartoon series for several years and that I can go to any children's library and see a shelf of Babar books (written by de Brunhoff's son, Laurent). So my goal here is not to banish this book the way some of you want to rid the world of these books...or tried it with these so that your precious children don't look at their grandparents sideways.

It is to provide some context for why we must periodically assess the titles that we deem as classics. Once upon a time, Helen Bannerman's 1899 book, Little Black Sambo, was a beloved classic. I've seen some of the comments that defend the story, and I won't ridicule your fond memories. But the title doesn't concern you at all? What about the names of his parents, Black Mumbo and Black Jumbo? Does your opinion change after viewing this 1935 cartoon? Are you sure that you wouldn't rather read Sam and the Tigers (1996) by Julius Lester? Although it isn't a children's book, shall we discuss the evolution of Agatha Christie's 1939 classic And Then There Were None (since its original title was taken from a nursery rhyme/minstrel song)?

A few months ago, a school district outside of Seattle faced some backlash for moving Harper Lee's beloved classic To Kill a Mockingbird (TKAM) from a list of required reading to a list of suggested titles. The headlines claimed that the book was being banned, and initially I jumped in with both feet to decry such a blasphemous and knee-jerk decision. I got into a civil exchange with a parent who lives near the district, and he provided more context: the book was not being banned, it was being de-emphasized in the curriculum to give teachers more options. He pointed out that the issues being sensationalized in the media were valid critiques of the novel and that perhaps another story written from the perspective of the Black community in segregated 1950s Alabama would have more impact. We agreed that TKAM should still be taught, but that it should not be regarded as THE definitive antiracist text.

I was reminded of that exchange after reading Babar because it dawned on me how we become so committed to what we once knew such that we often refuse to see what we now know in clearer terms. I didn't even read TKAM in high school; it wasn't included in my high school Honors English curriculum (yes, that's a flex, but keep reading). I read that book eleven years later as an adult when it was chosen as the Big Read for the City of Chicago in 2001. I've seen the Academy Award-winning movie with Gregory Peck many times. And as an anniversary gift, I took the Hub to see the play on Broadway this past fall. Yet, if I am honest, I had never questioned why this book was so beloved until confronted by several revelations, particularly after seeing the play.

Why is this book, written from the perspective of a child, supposed to depict Southern racism in the 1950s more convincingly than other books written by BLACK authors who actually experienced it first-hand? In the play, it becomes clear that the most prominent voices we hear throughout are those of the observers instead of those who are the recipients of the town's racism. Remember when the alleged first draft of the novel was released and folks lost their minds because their beloved Atticus Finch was not all that heroic? In the play, that notion is hinted at in one confrontational exchange he has with Calpurnia, his maid, when she calls him out for his condescension. Ultimately, the original is a story told by an admiring daughter, and as a Daddy's girl myself, how else is she supposed to remember her father, except as a hero?

So when I saw Babar on my bookshelf, all of my childhood nostalgia hit before the reality. My Grandmother. My Aunt. Talking elephants that interact with people. Adventures in Paris, a night at the opera. A mystery to solve. The Babar that had been etched in my memory wasn't even from that original story, but it never occurred to me to look critically at the various subliminal references and nuances. It isn't even hidden--it is all right there as plain as the transformation that occurs while turning the page on Babar the wild elephant morphs into a civilized dandy once he dons a tailored shirt, a new suit, and shoes with spats worn on his hind legs. Instead of a zoo, the rich Old Lady's parlor is where he receives visitors who are regaled by the exploits of his past life in the wild. And so what if he doesn't have room in the car for his unclothed and unsophisticated aunts, they can follow behind on all fours...

Look, you can keep the original Little Black Sambo, those problematic Looney Tunes cartoons, and your racist pancake batter if it makes you feel better. But in a world where our children catch on a lot quicker than we did, you try explaining why you refuse to let go of outdated and offensive images. Or just start with the absurdity of moving a full-grown African elephant into one's home, even if he is house-broken and speaks French. I don't recall what book was substituted on our reading list in high school for TKAM, but if I were an English teacher today, I would concede the point that there are other titles, such as Ernest Gaines' brilliant A Lesson Before Dying, published in 1993 that could be taught in its place or alongside. If TKAM is truly a classic worthy of our adulation, it won't be forgotten, which is the entire point of initiatives like the Big Read. 

Since I mentioned the Dr. Suess Library as having facilitated my introduction to the character of Babar, allow me to point out that times change, and not everything that was normal or acceptable remains that way. It was an internal review conducted by his estate that prompted those six titles to be dropped from publication. They aren't banned books in the traditional sense, so if you insist on buying them on eBay for your grandchildren, nobody is stopping you. But I am judging your insistence that your nostalgia is of greater importance than the offense it causes others, particularly when I know some of you actively protested a book about male co-parenting penguins (based on real events, unlike de Brunhoff's fictional talking elephants).

I am not chucking my Babar book. As I mentioned, it is 35+ years old and in good condition, so maybe one day I can sell it on eBay to help pay for a trip to Paris with my daughter. For the time being, it can go back on the shelf and stay there without upsetting the balance of life in our home. I might just go searching at my parents' house for that other book about Babar's lost crown. And if the Kid asks me to read it again, I won't object. Because I can balance that out by pairing it with other books, such as Dr. Suess' Horton Hears a Who (1954) or one of the fantastic Mo Willems' Elephant and Piggie books. There are also stories that mythologize elephants from Africa and India, as well as stories that teach children to respect wildlife in their natural habitat. And that is the point, there is a whole wide world of stories out there from which to choose, so no need for limits!

All Rise

Last week dredged up aspects of the professional trauma I have been working very hard to overcome for the past two decades. It is the trauma that fuels my imposter syndrome--what makes me think that I am somehow not where I am supposed to be, or what I claim to be at this point in my life and career.

I also must mention this (because it is significant), that January kinda went straight to Hell as soon as my Mom got sick mid-month. The last piece I finished (and posted) is more than a month old, and I'm sure that given the state of the world, most of you have better things to do than wait around for me to get my mind right to write. But please bear with me...we all are doing the best we can.

To the matter at hand, my initial impulse was to pop in here to try to write a quick piece about the retirement announcement for Supreme Court Associate Justice Stephen Breyer, his likely successor, and a bunch of other stuff related to being a Black woman in the legal profession. (A whole week later, you probably surmised, there was nothing quick about the writing of this piece.) Some of the early musings and shit takes on this announcement have triggered me...I am reminded that I have been hearing much of this same skepticism and open contempt for nearly 25 years, going back to my law student days, and I'm just getting to the place where it doesn't feel like an auction block inspection.

BLACK WOMEN ARE QUALIFIED FOR ANY AND EVERY LEGAL POSITION!

No, I didn't stutter and yes, I said what I said. Now that I have captured the accumulated microaggressions and frustrations of my career in one exasperated utterance, allow me to illustrate with a memory from sometime in 1996, when a student mutiny was threatened in one of my law school classes. Several students had expressed their discontent with the teaching style of our Constitutional Criminal Law professor. I don't recall all of the details or complaints, but I remember several basic points: (1) she was the only Black woman on the faculty; (2) no one else had been the recipient of as many complaints; (3) she found out; (4) she addressed it in class but that still didn't satisfy the mob; and (5) I clearly had NO idea what that must have been like for her, so at some point I plan to track her down and send her a note that simply says, DAMN. NOTHING has changed Sis.

Mere hours after the retirement announcement, Roger Wicker, the senior Senator from Mississippi (yeah, of all places) declared that he wouldn't vote for a Black woman to ascend to the high court because he doesn't support affirmative action, so we're already in for one helluva confirmation process. No doubt he speaks for at least half of his Colleagues who can't fathom such a notion either. As a matter of fact, I am certain that he speaks for many of the deplorables that found this meme so hilarious and spot on ----->

Yeah, the quiet parts said aloud is the type of exhausting bullshit that we've been subjected to for years. The questions of competency. The lack of support. The set ups for failure. The blame game. The system that requires you to clear hurdles and when you do, they increase the length of the race, increase the height of the hurdles, pour oil on the track, and then swear that any teetering or stumbles are proof of your lack of talent, ability, and intellect. By calling out any of these additional barriers and complications as the racist/sexist impediments that they are, we get branded as the Angry Black Woman who is requesting special favors. Ask me how I know...

Or ask Charlotte E. Ray (1850-1911), the first Black woman to receive a law degree in this country in 1872 from Howard University. Ask her what it must have been like to have finished school, passed the bar exam, but not have enough clients to sustain her legal practice due to the systematic racism and sexism of the times. Undaunted, she returned to her original profession of teaching and became an activist in the Black clubwoman and suffrage movements. Or you might ask abolitionist, journalist, and educator Mary Ann Shadd Cary (1823-1893), the second Black woman to receive her law degree from Howard University in 1883. She turned to the law after a lifetime of activism, including time she spent in Canada working with the formerly enslaved. Imagine the obstacles faced by these two women, both of whom were alive when Chief Justice Robert B. Taney (1777-1864) issued the Dred Scott decision in 1857 that declared Black people had no rights that whites were bound to respect. What kind of special favors did they receive in a country where they weren't even regarded as American citizens?

What special favors benefitted Pauli Murray (1910-1985) when she graduated at the top of her law school class at Howard University in 1944, 60+ years after Ray, but was denied the Rosenwald fellowship for graduate work at Harvard Law School because of her gender? Murray penned the term "Jane Crow" and wrote the foundation for the arguments that future jurist Ruth Bader Ginsburg (1933-2020) would use to build her legal advocacy against gender distinctions in the law. Ginsburg, admitted to Harvard Law a decade after Murray was denied admission, was preceded by Lila Fenwick (1932-2020), the first Black woman to graduate from the law school in 1956. How special must it have been for Fenwick, who lived in segregated housing as a student, to be summoned along with the other women in her class before the dean to justify occupying a seat that could have gone to a male student. 

I imagine it must have felt as special as the humiliation I experienced when one of my classmates penned the same query in our law school newsletter after the Hopwood decision (1996) emboldened him to challenge our right to matriculate.

Because of such incredulity, I internalized the false belief that a Black woman who did not make law review or moot court or get a prestigious clerkship after law school or make partner by the age of 30 was somehow a professional failure. Nevermind that I wasn't the only twenty-something idealist who had a little too much fun in the restaurants and bars of New Orleans during the mid 90s. According to that classmate, Black women were occupying space that some better qualified white student deserved. Driven by the need to disprove that sentiment, my career path has involved working on Capitol Hill, working at two civil rights organizations, teaching American History and Government, representing the indigent, running a solo practice, writing, and advocating for social justice. Yet, it took me years to redefine what a successful attorney should be in my own words. 

Which brings me to Amy Coney Barrett, newest Associate justice on the Supreme Court. Even though I am almost two years younger, we were in school at the same time and can both claim membership in the law school class of 1997. I read her biography and see a few parallels to my own story, including the all-girls' Catholic high school to the English degree from a private undergraduate college. Where our lives diverge is law school and the subsequent trajectories of our careers. She graduated at the top of her law school class from Notre Dame, had two prestigious federal clerkships, a coveted law firm job, a tenured professorship at her alma mater, and then her most recent stint as a federal judge before she was tapped to ascend to the high court. In the midst of that all that, she found the time to be a mother to seven children. Regardless of my concerns about her ideology, the rushed nomination process, and my reverence for the justice whom she replaced, the fact is that Justice Barrett is extraordinary.

Did I mention she has seven children?

Sonia Sotomayor is also extraordinary, as is Elena Kagan and as was Sandra Day O'Connor. In death, we've practically canonized Ruth Bader Ginsburg to judicial sainthood. A quick look at the top candidates for this next opening reveals a very specific pathway to this particular job, and most, if not all of the potential nominees possess similar experience. Therefore, why should a Black woman with an equally impressive and substantial resume not be a top contender? In a twitter thread, I pointed out that in the last 25 years, Black women have been claiming space at every level of the profession as elected officials, judges, corporate counsels in the Fortune 500, partners at prestigious law firms, professors in the Ivy League towers, and leading civil rights organizations. So there is no reason to question if one of us is qualified to serve on the Court. 

Thus, when Senator Kennedy from Louisiana wonders out loud if a Black woman with a law degree can distinguish between one of those heavy ass hornbooks and a J. Crew catalog, we aren't misinterpreting the implication. He didn't stutter or misspeak or make a bad joke. Similar to when he asked Justice Barrett, mother of seven, about the division of labor in her household, it is that special brand of black letter bullshit called sexism that would give him the impression that those kinds of musings and questions were appropriate or harmless. The same sexism that would never question the competency of the male lawyer who couldn't figure out how to re-adjust his Zoom filters.

When you decry the President's intention to nominate a Black woman as affirmative action, Senator Cruz-to-Cancun-when-it-gets-too-cold-in-Texas, can you explain why taking an affirmative act to increase diversity in our government is a bad thing? Since you know exactly how many Black women there are in this country, are you suggesting that representation does not matter in the makeup of the federal judiciary? It didn't matter when Justice Barrett was nominated to replace the late Ruth Bader Ginsburg or when Justice Thomas was nominated to replace the late Thurgood Marshall? When you exclaim applicants who aren't Black women need not apply, surely you are not calling for Supreme Court vacancies to be posted on Monster.com or LinkedIn...

Does it terrify these Senators that times have changed such that a Black woman within a heartbeat of the Presidency, a Black woman poised to become Governor of Georgia (yeah, we are claiming it), and Black women in various leadership positions throughout the country, it has gotten a lot harder to credibly denounce our intellect, talent, or abilities? Who honestly believes that Justice Sonia Sotomayor misinterprets the law because of her ethnicity (while voting with the departing "nice stately liberal" Stephen Breyer on most cases)? Are they worried about how best to pronounce Ketanji Brown Jackson or Leondra Kruger should one of them emerge as the preferred candidate? Or is it the realization that within a generation, and in spite of the best efforts to thwart and forestall progress, every revolutionary step towards freedom has been made because some Black woman got fed up and said, oh yeah (with an added muthafucka under her breath)...

In the same patronizing vein that some on the left thought Michelle Obama and Kamala Harris were legitimate suggestions, others on the right floated the notion that their favorite college dropout Candace Owens would be a good choice. Some of those same folks circulated that Aunt Jemima meme on Twitter...but girlfriend was genuinely flattered so I won't even bother to burst that bubble except to point out that at least Obama and Harris finished college and have law degrees. Anita Hill is the other suggestion I found rather problematic, for obvious reasons, but also because this vacancy isn't like the Academy Awards (it isn't an honor just to be nominated).

It is a lifetime appointment to the highest court in the land. It is a call to service in a co-equal branch of government, endowed with the power to interpret the Constitution. The same document that included a three-fifths clause and had to be amended twice to extend voting rights to Black men and then to women. A Black woman in that seat won't undo historical atrocities or systemic racism, but she'll have a vote. One vote can save our democracy. Her voice will speak to future generations and form the basis of how the law will be interpreted. Who knows what long-term impact she will have on the Court? 

Will she be as significant as Justice Joseph Rucker Lamar (1857-1916) or his cousin Justice Lucius Quintus Cincinnatus Lamar (1825-1893), whose name deserves to be common knowledge even if his tenure on the Court was brief? In all of this faux outrage about the perceived unfair advantage race will play in this process, has anyone addressed how most of these past justices were appointed because of their political connections, not for their legal expertise? Several justices served in all three branches of government, with the Court serving as the final career capstone. Did you know that two Chief Justices William Howard Taft (1857-1930), the 27th President of the United States, and Earl Warren (1891-1974), 30th Governor of California, both asked for the job? 

In 1971, the aforementioned Renaissance woman, the Rev. Pauli Murray "applied" for the vacancy created by the retirement and death of Justice Hugo Black (1886-1971). Again, Murray was a decade ahead of her time since we know she didn't get the job. Instead, in fulfillment of his campaign pledge to appoint the first woman to the Court, President Ronald Reagan tapped Sandra Day O'Connor in 1981. In the forty years since her historic appointment and tenure, thirteen justices have been confirmed: eight have been white men, four have been women, and two were people of color. Two of thirteen since 1981. Two.

Therefore, it isn't affirmative action that minimizes and marginalizes the accomplishments of Black women in the legal profession. It is racism and sexism. It is the virtue signaling from Senators Cruz, Kennedy, and Wicker before a name has even been announced that she is the beneficiary of unearned privileges--notwithstanding the privilege of being white, male, and well-connected that benefitted most of her predecessors. Nor the fact that affirmative action has been most beneficial to white women like Justices O'Connor and Barrett, both of whom were chosen because of their race and gender. No one besmirches O'Connor for having been a classmate and former girlfriend of the late Chief Justice William Rehnquist (1924-2005), nor does anyone attempt to shame Justice Barrett for having a career and seven kids. Recall the backlash Madame VP faced for having dated former San Francisco Mayor Willie Brown? And to keep it real, a Black or Latinx nominee with seven children would NEVER (and I don't even need to complete that thought)!

The race may be longer, the hurdles are more cumbersome, the oil on the track is slick; yet I have NO DOUBT that a Black woman prepared for a moment such as this will not only finish the race--she will triumph. Oyez, oyez, oyez!

Another COVID Christmas

Happy New Year! Pretend that you are reading this right after Christmas, which technically you are, but you know, as if the calendar still read 2021...

December is always a crazy month for me. I tend to experience it in three distinct phases: (1) my birthday; (2) that weird space between the 10th when everything is still moving in slow motion until things suddenly accelerate to the 24th; and (3) then the countdown to January and the annual question of how long to leave up the decorations. (For the record, mine are still up.)

This year, as in the past three years, it has been one crazy ass month.

It began with so much hope and promise. I actually got to celebrate my birthday with brunch, a play, and dinner. I ordered our Christmas cards on time and got my Holiday Gift Guide up on IG and FB. I got most of our shopping done, including some gifts for my Dad, and all was proceeding steadily...then shit hit the fan on the 16th.

I got a phone call, and I almost didn't answer it because I didn't recognize the number. But there was a little green check mark beside it, kind of like those blue check marks on Twitter, so it registered as a verified number and not a spam call to get solar panels on my roof. It was the assistant vice principal at my daughter's school. The Kid had been identified as a close contact of someone who tested positive for COVID.

As you might imagine that notification threw me into a panic spiral which was exacerbated by the fact that I was sitting in the car in front of the Target. The plan had been to go inside to pick up an order, then to head over to the mall for a little more shopping for all of the events that had been planned for the coming weekend. I called the Hub to inform him, and then after wandering in a circle around the Target for at least five rotations, I tried to contain the urge to scream.

We got ourselves tested the next day. We notified the appropriate persons with whom we had been in contact. Our results came back negative on Saturday, as did the two subsequent tests we took over the next few days. All of our extra-curricular activities were cancelled and where appropriate, everything went virtual and we stayed quarantined in the house (except to get tested). We got cleared the day before Christmas Eve and we were able to resume the rest of our holiday preparations. In a word, we were spared.

However, other members of our family were not. My brother, who is a teacher, tested positive for COVID the same day we got the call about my daughter's status. His wife and youngest daughter tested positive that weekend. Two of my nephews in New Jersey also tested positive, so we decided to cancel our travel plans to New York. I have heard from several other people that this Omarion variant of COVID got to them before they could get boosted. Just this past week, I have read emails from several parents that their children tested positive on or about Christmas Day.

I am still suppressing the urge to scream. It isn't enough to suggest that we got lucky, because I know it was more than a roll of the dice. The Hub got his booster in October. My parents got their in-home boosters in November. The Kid got vaccinated as soon as she was eligible, and I got my booster shot a few days after my birthday. Fortunate doesn't even begin to describe my relief, and exasperated isn't an adequate word to describe how it feels to be heading into season 3 of COVID.

Maybe to the folks who keep suggesting that this isn't that big of a deal, it is just an inconvenience to cancel travel plans at the last minute and have to provide all kinds of documentation so as not to forfeit a $500 deposit. Maybe I shouldn't have been anxious that on the same day I got word that my child was a close contact, she had just been in dance class around other kids and their parents, so out of respect for their health, they all had to be notified. Maybe it isn't all that difficult to keep an energetic six year old occupied when she wants to be in school with her friends and there really isn't a sufficient virtual learning option. Maybe all of the families that just celebrated their first or second holiday season without a cherished loved one should just...

In all of the other parts of the country where folks have been protesting mask mandates, misquoting MLK, and blocking access to mail-in voting, maybe it doesn't matter that we were just starting to get back to some version of normal pre-pandemic living. Now we have to reset. I've had to re-draw imaginary lines around my family again because I can't afford to slip up. Contrary to your jeers that I am living in fear, nah...I am living in the real world where a global pandemic compels me to take precautions the same way you "live in fear" over Critical Race Theory ruining your lives.

And that is the part that has me scanning the thesaurus for better words to describe my feelings. Vexed is a good word, but it is too close to vaxxed (which is now a word that doesn't trigger the Spell checker). I am vexed that people are so infantile and peevish about making minor adjustments to preventing the spread of an airborne virus that has killed more than 800,000 people in this country. Thankfully, I am also vaxxed and boosted. Another word that I like (one that my Mom used a lot when we were younger) is heedless. Because calling folks selfish is so 2020 (and deplorable is so 2016).

After her embarrassing interview with TFG wherein he contradicted her stance against the vaccine, I wanted to find a good word to describe the prattling college drop-out pundit who swears that she is smarter than folks with medical degrees. It was a toss-up between supercilious and delusional, but as I watched her cat fight on Twitter with her sorority girl rival, it seemed more appropriate to move along and just let them have at it. Mudwrestling isn't even a sport. As for the other young clout-chaser I saw attempt to take on the Oprah over her holiday dinner policy, she definitely earned all of the ridicule meted out for taking aim at our Patron Saint and missing. I almost felt a twinge of pity for her, having invited the wrath of a gang of blue checks on Twitter who probably should have left her to being dragged by the unwashed masses. But I won't waste any emotions on another opinionated Canadian (that's an inside joke, btw).

Nor am I going to waste any energy complaining about these new CDC guidelines since I am going to keep wearing my masks, washing my hands, and staying the heck away from people who want to live free and die. I admit to having advantages that allow me to ignore the shortened quarantine recommendations, and I realize that there are economic costs to COVID that someone must bear. Therefore, if that means I have to wait an extra day or so for an Amazon Prime Delivery, so be it. I can wait for that fire pit that I haven't yet ordered because it isn't a necessity. Save your trash talk about my alleged misunderstanding the global economy if that is what makes you feel better, but I have been ridiculed ALL of my Busy Black life for one thing or another, so calling me a sheep isn't the worst insult I've heard. Not even top ten.

And in spite of COVID being that houseguest that has way over-stayed and refuses to get the hint to GTFOH, I declare myself blessed this Christmas. First of all, my family walked away from a hit and run car accident. Second, my brother, his family, and my nephews are on the mend. Third, I already told you that my parents are vaxxed and boosted, and they are living one day at a time. In spite of daily attempts to steal my joy, I didn't even lean into my Grinch routine this year because as I reflected on the story of the birth of Christ, I had a revelation about real inconvenience. Try having to travel when you are nine months pregnant on the back of a donkey, giving birth in a barn without anesthesia, and then putting your newborn baby to sleep in a food trough for livestock. Add in a stream of uninvited visitors, including a child with a drum...

The Christmas story isn't about any of the superficial shit that we have emphasized all of these years. It isn't about disposable coffee cups or what the minimum wage-earning cashier says after bagging your purchases. It isn't that perfect Hallmark movie ending with a kiss in a gazebo. Nor is it about actually being in a church on the day in question (because I've done that, and nobody else comes but the most devout and childless). Christmas is the kindness that doesn't get staged for social media--the generosity, the selflessness, the humanity that transcends hashtags.

Therefore, if you think your holiday was ruined by COVID because Pete Buttigieg took paternity leave and your packages didn't arrive on time; the FOX News tree was intentionally set on fire; or because you didn't read the instructions and burnt your pumpkin pie...I've got a thimble-sized amount of empathy for you. Life happens. You are entitled to your feelings and I won't respond with the same kind of indifference and lack of compassion that has been the norm since the beginning of this pandemic. Better luck next year.

However, if your Christmas was impacted by COVID in a more extreme and tragic manner, you have my sincerest condolences and sympathies. If I could offer words of comfort, they would express my hope that you find some measure of reassurance that you are not alone in your suffering or grief. Others are in your midst ready to surround you with love and to see to your physical needs. In the event that all I can offer are thoughts and prayers, they are sincere in wishing for your ability to endure and power through this moment.

Finally, as it is now several days after both Christmas and the New Year, my personal public service announcement (because it is crazy out here in these COVID streets) is to take precaution and extra care. I have been reading some of the chatter on social media, so let me state at the outset, I am no scientist; I am a lawyer. And that part of me wonders how some of these folks get to go on television every day as if they are reading these recommendations for the first time on the air. As in, nobody considered that y'all were going to eff up sick leave, such as it is, for everybody? Therefore, let's all touch and agree that those CDC guidelines are aspirational in assuming that folks are going to be honest. And since that hasn't exactly been working out as we hoped, you can take care of you by masking up and getting vaxxed and boosted (or not); however, if you won't do either of those things, then stand six feet back! This isn't some gazebo scene out of a Hallmark movie.

Starting 2022 with a Ban

I really did not want to use ten to fifteen minutes of your valuable time on another angry rant about these Stunt Queens voters keep sending to Washington, nor did I intend to spend at least four hours writing one, but it needs to be said. Because some of these meaux faux y'all be sending here...

I thought that I could just rattle off a few paragraphs in disgust on the FB page and maybe reach the same six curious people that regularly see my posts. After all of these years I still can't outwit the algorithm, and I have accepted that. Which is one of my New Year Resolutions--to stop worrying about the internal sabotage and just set my sights on growing my base in other ways. And that is one of the main reasons why I am so vexed...

I don't use my little corner of cyberspace to say anything outrageous or misleading. I make carefully thought-out and intentional statements. My reasoning is usually sound. Even when I am fueled by emotion, I am neither mean-spirited nor a bully. I am also not a dumb bitch. But apparently that is what it takes to be heard. Or get elected to Congress these days.

Perhaps you might be reading this and thinking, well why are you complaining then? If you think you are so smart, why not run for Congress so that you can be heard? Hence, this rabbit hole lecture on why this country is doomed if y'all don't get serious about saving this democracy.

Earlier today it was announced that Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene (R-GA) would be permanently banned from using her personal Twitter account to spread misinformation about COVID (and other assorted lies and conspiracies). I had typed out six extemporaneous paragraphs on my Facebook page to get to the point where it stopped making sense to argue that I don't care about her, because I do. Therefore, I decided to migrate that rant to this space where I can flesh out and explain exactly why it matters that elected officials like Greene deserve to get singled out and exposed as vivid examples why you just can't send every crazy loud mouth to Congress.

As a factual introduction, I need to debunk the arguments that Greene is being unfairly silenced or censored. She is not. She still has plenty of communication avenues to share her insanity, including access to her official Twitter account which is tied to her position as an elected Member of Congress. Presumably, she can continue to tweet all kinds of nonsense and foolishness because it serves the public interest and her constituents to know that she is batshit insane and stupid. My best guess is that Twitter will flag her comments with a disclaimer if they contain false or misleading information, which is what was done with the former DESPOTUS when he was accused of inciting violence after George Floyd was killed.

The issue is not whether she can say whatever she wants, but where she can say what she wants. The First Amendment offers this beautiful declaration that the people ought to be able to express themselves without fear of government sanction. There have been several cases argued over the years that have provided some guidelines for how that speech is regulated, so I won't delve into all of that here. Just know that the right to free speech is subject to certain reasonable time, place, and manner restrictions, as well as considerations for content. The operative word contained in that amendment is Congress.

Twitter is not Congress. It is a communication platform.

When you signed up for any of these various social media platforms (Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, WhatsApp, Tumblr, and even an old school platform like Blogger or MySpace), there was an agreement that most of us skipped reading. In essence, it said that we didn't own the space, but that we were being granted access to use the space. Therefore, it is a misconception to believe that we have the right to use these spaces in any manner we want.

Now for the most part, we know that the content police overlook a LOT of what goes on (so I won't digress into a side rant about how these same platforms are used for bullying and various criminal enterprises), but they are. Knowing that social media is internally regulated, it is problematic when someone in a high-profile position like Marjorie Taylor Greene (MTG) or the DESPOTUS with millions of followers abuses the privilege of access. They have the ability to influence how people think or behave just by offering an opinion or sharing misinformation or promoting propaganda.

When we call social media a communication platform, we are literally saying that it is the online equivalent of a step ladder and a megaphone. It is a podium, a stage, or a pulpit with a microphone and giant loud speakers. I've addressed this previously, but it bears repeating and emphasis--be wary to whom you pass the mic.

For lack of a better pop cultural reference, MTG is that bully in the racoon hat from A Christmas Story. She lurks in the alley to jump out to terrorize people, whether it is a young activist with whom she disagrees on the appropriateness of guns in schools or her fellow lawmakers whom she taunts for wearing masks. Having been stripped of her committee assignments for her excessive trolling barely six weeks after being sworn into her term, she spends most of her time loitering in the hallways and tunnels, devising a workout alternative to CrossFit in the Members gym, and auditioning for right wing media outlets as insurance in case she doesn't get re-elected.

In other words, she is a waste. I cannot emphasize how utterly disgraceful it is for this woman to even have an official Twitter account, let alone an office and paid staff. The fact that she occupies a seat in Congress from which she accomplishes nothing other than to promote herself is beyond words. I don't care how or why she got elected. I just know that she didn't question the legitimacy of the votes that sent her here back in November 2020. Yet, she has been a vocal and visible proponent of the Big Lie that somehow there were illegitimate votes cast from her state that resulted in the ouster of MAGA Man, the hero to whom she has pledged her allegiance. Because it sure ain't to the same Constitution we both swore to uphold and defend.

To be clear, my disdain for her isn't just ideological. There are several Stunt Queens serving in Congress and I get increasingly frustrated with every single one of them, from both political parties. At the end of the day, the job is to represent the people who elected you, not to spend half the time engaging in silly Twitter fights or negotiating a primetime appearance on cable news or a Sunday morning talk show. The personal affront of their existence is why I have chosen violence as my opening salvo this New Year.

And because I don't have a congressional vote. The District of Columbia has a non-voting Congressional Delegate who can introduce legislation, vote in committee, but she must appeal to her Colleagues to vote on behalf of the citizens of this city. Therefore, I couldn't position myself to run for political office on behalf of my beloved hometown or its 700,000+ citizens even if I wanted to (and no thanks, I would rather fight from the outside). If I had the temperament, I guess I could run for City Council or Mayor thanks to Home Rule charter. But with powers limited to the purview granted by Congress, and the way I cuss...

A year ago, the world witnessed how partisan elected officials disregard the citizens of DC as expendable. While MTG and her co-conspirators in the Insurrection Caucus encouraged the rioters as they breached the Capitol, the DESPOTUS refused to engage the National Guard to quell the uprising. No concern for the lives of office staff, facilities and maintenance workers, or the Capitol Police and there was no effort to protect the residents of the surrounding neighborhoods if that mob had continued their rampage beyond the Capitol grounds. When the Mayor, the City Council, and various experts cited the limitations of Home Rule in invoking the mechanisms to protect the City in a historic hearing on Statehood, their pleas were dismissed along partisan lines. 

Thus, it incenses me that this woman and I, same age and with roots from the same state, are not treated equally as American citizens. I worked in that same Capitol building more than 20 years ago. I can't even enter the Longworth Building, where her office is located, to transact business at my credit union branch because of her seditious antics. If I participated in a peaceful protest to urge passage of the John Lewis Voting Rights Advancement Act on the street, how long before I would get arrested? She lost use of her personal Twitter account, but she can still reserve time to take to the floor of the House of Representatives to spew conspiracy theories and racist rhetoric to all of America, thanks to the C-Span cameras. Yet, no matter how eloquent, rational, and right I am in my indignation, I would be lucky to reach 25 people with this rant. I might get a few RTs, but that rarely happens in the eleven years I've been blogging...

So, ban that broad because anything less than pulling the cord on her bullshit is to concede that what she allegedly has a right to say is more important than the impact of what she says. She can't shout FIRE in a crowded theater and then shrug when folks get trampled. She sought this attention and the exposure, so she must use it responsibly or lose the privilege. And face the consequences same as her MAGA Man who lost his account too. What is good for the goose is also good for the gander.

Finally, I hope not to spend this much time and energy on Marjorie Taylor Greene again in the foreseeable future. She will continue to piss me off, but the next time, I will take action instead of offense. She represents a district in Georgia that might be hard to flip given redistricting shenanigans and partisan election law changes, but there are four declared Democratic challengers and one Republican. Surely any one of them can do a better job of serving in Congress. Statewide, I must work to re-elect my Morehouse Brother Rev. Raphael Warnock to the Senate and to elect my Spelman Sister Stacy Abrams to be the first Black woman to serve as a Governor. We need to register voters and organize for other local elections. I need to save up a little bail money, in case I run into some good trouble (although my Daddy has pledged that won't happen if he can help it). Let's not get distracted by her nonsense because that was clearly the job she was sent to do. 

Feeling Secure

Twas the day after the Christmas and I spent the afternoon on the sofa with a bottle of sparkling wine, chicken strips, and a few hours of kid-free silence. So naturally, I did what every other Insecure fan should have been doing in preparation for the series finale later that evening--I caught up on the episodes that had I missed or half-watched from this last season.

Now, because I am mindful that there are Busy Black folks out there who aren't fans or maybe haven't had a chance to watch the finale, so I won't spend that much time this Monday quarterbacking the finale. Watch it, come to your own conclusions, and then come back here for my take on what I hope will be the impact of Insecure for the long-term.

1. Conversations with our families about estate planning - This really hit home for me. My parents wrote their wills some twenty years ago, long before there was a notion of the chronic health issues we have faced for the past ten. My Mom, on the sage advice of Suzie Orman, had the foresight to invest in long term care insurance, which has made been a lifesaver in every possible way. While my Dad is still old school with respect to his faith in life insurance and bank savings, it was the financial planning that my Mom initiated that has really made this season of their lives manageable for us as their children.

There's so much more to say on this topic, because Black people can be inconsistent when it comes to death. On the one hand, we deal with it as a part of life, yet it amazes me just how reluctant our families are to plan for anything other than the funeral. I don't want to think about dying either, but if these last two years have taught us anything, it is that we need to have contingencies in place to deal with the unexpected. TALK TO YOUR PARENTS! Get their passwords. Have them walk you through their finances. Ask them how they want things to be settled. And talk to your siblings so that everyone is on the same page. Ain't nothing worse than drama and tension on the front pew that never gets resolved. 

2. Embracing imperfection by dropping the Black superwoman trope - The name of the show was Insecure. A lot of y'all missed that. Some of you were very critical that Issa didn't have her shit together from the beginning. Some of you probably thought highly of Molly until she realized how much of a hot ass mess she had been for four seasons. Some of you were more concerned about Tiffany wearing your sorority colors than you were about the vulnerability she showed as a new mother suffering with post-partum depression. You might have missed the fact that Kelli was sober this entire season, which was a good thing considering that she pissed her pants during Coachella and got into all kinds of nonsense whenever she imbibed. Y'all were siding with Lawrence's irresponsible fuckboi declaration that Condola blew up his life when she got pregnant (which we're going to revisit a little later).

Life is messy and not even fictional people are perfect. Thank goodness!

3. Addressing the stigma of mental health, especially among Black men - We saw Molly with a therapist, and I know that the religulous among you will argue that all she needed was Jesus. But I'm sure He would have sent her to a therapist too. Despite the ultimate outcome of his story arc, Nathan was one of the most valuable characters, working through his issues with others and with himself. Unlike most stereotypical depictions of mental illness (the homeless vagrant or the drug addicted loser), it was refreshing to see a high functioning, yet flawed individual who owned his issues. 

4. Establishing and maintaining mature co-parenting relationships - So we've reached the hill where I plant my flag--Lawrence, the dude who perpetually let life happen to him finally grew a pair! The fact that it took his fast-talking friend Chad to blurt that out at him for it to finally sink in that he needed to make some choices and man the fuck up (and you thought that was only about his on-and-off again situationship with Issa)...

And one of those choices was to be more present in the life of his son with Condola. She didn't get pregnant--they were fucking. Birth control goes both ways, but sometimes it fails and one of those little swimmers is gonna go all the way (we all saw Look Who's Talking). Given that Lawrence was rather promiscuous generous, I'm surprised that he hadn't created more babies...but y'all aren't ready for that conversation.

Instead, let's keep the focus on the fact that if more folks took responsibility for their actions, the world would be so much better for the children that result. I say that as a lawyer who used to represent parents in their custody disputes. I say that as a woman who has read some of the really shitty takes that some weekend Dads have expressed about paying child support. I say that as a mother with equal disdain for the toxic Moms who feel entitled to erect insurmountable barriers to healthy co-parenting because they have irrational trust and control issues. 

Look, parenting is hard within a marriage, let alone between two households. We only got one full episode, a HUGE blow-up, and a few tranquil scenes scattered among subsequent episodes, but I assure you, it took a LOT of work to get him to that happy ending. 

5. Blackness is Beautiful - I mean, we know this but I don't think the rest of the world always gets to see it presented that way. Sure, we've had sitcoms with all-Black casts that have been unapologetically Black in the past, but this time we got an experience that showcased Black Los Angeles as well. We saw Black people at art galleries, at outdoor festivals, planning events, attending Coachella, hiking, hanging out on the beach, owning businesses, and doing all of the bougie stuff that white folks assume we don't do. We drink coffee too, but in every other sitcom, we'd be the sassy barista or the silent busboy. In any other sitcom, we'd see a few Black faces in the crowd and that would be touted as inclusion. For once, it was great to see us as the foreground and the background. It was significant to depict various aspects of Black life that weren't confined to any one space within the community--the Dunes apartment complex in Inglewood was just as integral as Molly's downtown office or Crenshawn's warehouse workspace or Black alumni weekend at Stanford.

It matters that Issa Rae, the actress, writer, and producer was an aspirant just ten years ago when we first encountered Misadventures of Awkward Black Girl back in 2011 on YouTube. Like most people who became fans of that effort, who could have foreseen that it would lead Rae to the point where she is today? Not just in her career, but also the other Black actors, writers, and directors that she took along with her for the ride: Stella Meghie, Melina Matsoukas, Prentice Penny, Natasha Rothwell, Jay Ellis, and Yvonne Orji. I am thinking about Tracy Oliver, the antagonist on the web series, who is now a budding media mogul in her own right. There is also Robin Thede, the writer and producer of the hilariously funny and Emmy-nominated A Black Lady Sketch Show. I am thinking that when Rae stated that she was rooting for everyone Black, that meant EVERYBODY.

Of course, the predictable backlash to this will be to point out that there is no such place as Black LA if we only make up 8% of that city's population. Some snooty TV executive, probably the same guy that canceled Girlfriends without a series finale, will wonder aloud where in Los Angeles they found that many Black people and whether it was truly representative if there were not as many Latinx or Asian Americans depicted (because it is perfectly acceptable to accuse us of excluding others). Surely, token efforts to integrate shows like the original Sex and the City or Girls, which celebrated a very specific demographic of empowered white woman (the Christines and Kristins) would have more impact. Just greenlight a reboot or a pre-boot with a Black girlfriend and set one of the episodes outside of their typical exclusive enclaves of privilege. Send Miranda Hobbs to a Black church in Harlem with her law school professor. Because that isn't racist...

But it ain't progress either.

I would love for the legacy of Insecure to be a more sustained movement towards inclusion in Hollywood--more diversity in directors, writers, production crews, etc. It would be great, but I lived through the 80s and 90s. Ground-breaking popular Black shows still get marginalized while mediocre mainstream shows live on in syndication. I still believe that our stories deserve to be told and that there is plenty of space on the red carpet for more diversity, but I don't want to wait another 30 years just to make incremental advances. Because Issa Rae decided not to rest on her dreams, someone else needs to wake up and follow suit. 

Are you waiting on a chance, or are you taking any?

Read that again, look at the calendar, and get then serious about making that next move. If you saw the finale, that was a personal message in a bottle that even if the ground is shaking beneath your feet, trust yourself...Everything is going to be, Okay?!